is it fall yet?

so is fall here yet? i need cool crisp air to breath...

my best friend just found out she is having a little girl...

(her first! she has two little boys already!)

i've been a little under the weather here lately, no good!

and had to call in sick on my 2nd day of work at my new job!

(mortified! b/c i'm NEVER sick!)

don't you just love the fox and the hound...

breaking blogger silence

So i guess its about time for me to break my blogger silence that has been going on for... well... awhile now. what have i been up to? here goes:

Shane and I had a marvelous 1 year anniversary down in Savannah last month. I'm thinking its my new happy place. I love the old historic building and the charming square gardens that are on every other turn. Its so romantic. We took a horse carriage tour and then an evening trolley ghost tour as well & I loved introducing "my Savannah" to Shane. I've just about decided that if i had to live anywhere else than my beloved Mountville, I'd choose Savannah. This trip we stayed further back off the river at our cozy bed and breakfast, The Azalea Inn, and I think I liked it much better. I could walk those old charming backstreets any day. {I'm ready to go back tomorrow}

Here we are finishing dinner one night at the underground Alligator Soul ! Yummmm.....

Yes, Savannah was definitely a highlight this past month for my family also experienced a bit of heartache recently as well. Not the end of the world kinda of stuff but when a family is as close as mine, when one member experiences troubled times, we all do. But Jesus is good through the good and bad... and time really does have a way of healing as well.

{I want you by: Kelly Clarkson}

Its been hot hot here the last couple of days with thunderstorm (with even hale last night). I recently broke out my Kelley Clarkson All I Ever Wanted CD and have been jamming while on the road. I love that girl! She can SANG!

Summertime food is here! The last couple nights I've made this stuffed zucchini:

and this lime {i used lemon}, avocado & shrimp salad {but made it into a sandwich with roll & a bit of lettuce}:

other interesting info includes: getting cussed out by a man yesterday in the publix parking lot for not putting my buggy up in front of his 8 year old daughter who was in a catholic school uniform {and just FYI: i usually put my buggy up but it was SO hot and the buggy holder was way across the parking lot from me so i didn't... hate me, whatever} I wanted to roll my eyes, flip him a finger, and fly out of the parking lot... but then i remembered I have a Jesus sticker on the back of my car so I couldn't... instead i just gave a sigh, smiled and drove off. Situations like that always throw me for a loop.

a few friday favs

while i am feeling a bit better {thanks for all ya'lls lovely well wishes}, i'm still in the midst of battling this deep/lung hurting cough. yes, it hasn't been pretty. the sick taking care of the sick is always a bit pitiful. and i didn't feel like i could call in at work because we're SO short staffed and i couldn't do it to my fellow coworkers. however, on the positive, my voice is coming back & that's always a good sign! while catching up on some of my usual bloggies, i am loving some of their stuff! take a look!

I'll Seen & I'll Said was also feeling some Mary Oliver {see last post quote} love. browse over here to view one of her lovely poems.

For all those obsessed with pinterest, annalynnreilly has pinned some loverly pins. Look below at this great little cottage she introduce me to. Isn't it cute! And here she blogged about a beautiful, exposed brick kitchen. Its devine!

*****

Seeing this picture {below} of these dark hair girls over at Live Love Small, I was completely brought back to the days when my older sister, me, & one of my younger sisters all shared a room. {I probably wouldn't have minded if our room looked like that!} We were about these girls ages when we shared, all had long, dark brown hair, & i can remember us always wearing large, over sized t-shirts to bed! Fun times!

Happy Weekend

ballad of a dove

Remember Tennyson's "The Lady Of Shalott"? After being introduced to this poem here before I can remember from watching Anne of Green Gables , I have loved the magic & tragic romance that surrounds this poem. So I was excited when I saw The Band Perry's music video that touches on the poem as well.

And this is a great song. Have you heard it? Have you ever thought about the possibility? As I remember back on my mirror of memories over my past 26 years, I am flooded with warmth thinking of all my wonderful blessings I've experienced. And I've discovered that I am content. I have had enough time. Yes, of course I pray that I live to see another many many years. Jesus has blessed me with a wonderful life! With a wonderful husband & family! With plenty of food! A healthy body! A roof over my head (and 30 new acres of open spaces)! Yes, I am content.

Because we are not promised tomorrow. And if I die young, I'll be wearing white as I come into His kingdom! "I've had just enough time..."

hello new heart

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I'll be putting my feet up this weekend... they're killing me. Work... well, Jesus is working on my heart where my work is concerned... or opening up a new door! Yaye, I'm excited about either or! I never wanted to be that person who complained a/b their work! and that's whats starting to happen...

I never dreaded going to work until this past year. Now I have to mentally prepare myself and "rest up" before and after my shifts... its ridiculous. I want to yell at myself and say "suck it up, man!" but then I'll just cry quietly in bed after the lights are turned out. Pitiful, I know...

So hello new heart! or hello new job! or hello both!

ps. is there anyone who wakes up excited about their job and excited about their work? are there really jobs out there and people out there like that? just wondering...

wish I was here wednesday

Where do you wish you could be today? Olivia over at For Me has just started the wish i was here wednesday and I'm joining in! :D

I'm working today (Wednesday) and I probably wish i was pretty much anywhere but here. It has been so very hard and frustrating at work lately. Understaffed, overworked... with 7 patients as my normal load... its been difficult. Difficult for me to try to keep smiling and show compassion to patients, difficult for me to try and do 25 things all at once, and difficult for me not to hide my irritation toward my fellow coworkers at times.

So while browsing over at Bliss I discovered this winter wonderland... how I wish I was here!

the best is still to come

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I am reminded this morning by Town & Country Mom of the truest meaning of thanksgiving. Isn't it a true test of thanksgiving to still be thankful during the harsh times, the valleys... She explained, "It was faith, courage, and bravery that brought us to the first Thanksgiving. The first Thanksgiving came after leaving home, after suffering, after sickness, after grief. The celebration came after hard work, after toil, after struggle, after compromise. And still after such hardship and loss, people gave thanks and were grateful to God not so much because the worst was over, but because—in their faith, they knew the best was still to come."

I hold tightly to that faith, the best is still to come! And I do have so very much to be thankful for. God is good, through the valleys & the peaks! Happy Thanksgiving to you all!

Face Lift

Yes, as some of my thousands {chuckle, chuckle} of followers may have noticed, In My Tennis Shoes just received a bit of a face lift... nothing crazy and dramatic but it was brought to my attention that it has been looking a bit sluggish and uninspiring so the new look has commenced! Lately I've felt a bit disheartened, uncommitted and just "blah" concerning In My Tennis Shoes (and about my life in general really).

I believe my attitude is a simple reflection of the restlessness in my own heart. I feel like I need a face lift... or maybe a heart lift. With my grandmother's steep decline in health and currently being followed by hospice, it makes me reflective of her past 90 years {and what a wonderful, inspiring life she has lived!}. Watching the end of life also has a way of tugging on ones own heart and asking oneself, "Am I really living out my own life the way God intended? Am I following my own plan, with my own "grand" ideas?" Because if I'm not following His plan, my life has absolutely no potential in reaching its grand and ultimate purpose. And that's what I want... I desperately want to reach His ultimate design, I want to be burdened with it, consumed, and absolutely enthralled with His plan for my life. I know it will be beautiful... He's already at work!

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me... Psalm 51.10

I'm sad today...

I'm actually exhausted... but I am sad too. First: Dealing with sick patients is part of my job, its routine. Yep, see it every day. Having to cope with a loved one in the hospital that may/may not necessarily be treatable is not routine for me. Shouldn't have to be part of my job. My grandma, who just turned 90 a month ago, has not being doing well and this past week her health took a sharp dive in the wrong direction. Yes, my sweet grandma is in the hospital. She actually was admitted on my floor yesterday evening after an exhausting/overwhelming 12 hrs, right before shift change. Second: Dealing with patients family dynamics in the hospital is part of my job. Deal with it every day, routine... Coping with my own crazy/angry family dynamics over this "controversial" hospitalization... not routine. Shouldn't have to be part of my job.

Yes, I said controversial. Because it currently is controversial in my usual very close/large/ loving family. This loving grandmother raised 6 kids. One daughter is an RN/RT (who married a MD), one a RD (registered dietitian), one a lab technician. Out of those medical children have come other medical grand kids (such as myself, RN, another RD... PA... RN... and the list goes on friends. Those reading this currently in the medical profession understand what I'm talking about when we are talking about completely sitting back and letting nature take its course to a 90 year old DNR woman vs. seeking alternatives, although not invasive (how invasive is non- invasive to a 90 yr old?) to a completely alert and oriented (although lethargic currently), sharp, 90 year old. Is this her old age speaking? or is it something else that could be treatable/non treatable... There is a very fine line friends and my dear family is struggling to find it.

all in a days work...

the nursing cap

So work nearly killed me the last couple days...

Yep, almost killed over dead..

Killed over dead...

But, alas, here I am... not dead after all.

I knew I wanted to be a nurse since I was a kid. My mom said even when I was a small girl I was the "nurse" in the family, always taking care of my siblings when they were sick, always doing what needed to be done to make it better. I like that I'm efficient. I'm good at my job. Yes, I like that. I'm proud of that. And I really do like my job. I like the flow, like the rhythm.

And then there are days like today... and yesterday... and I think to myself that I may never be able to walk through those hospital doors again. Physically and mentally just can't do it any more. While talking to one of my girlfriends on the ride home and not being able to think of words to form a sentence, I see the effect of leaving for work at 0530 and returning home at 8:30 at night will do to ya... I sit here and ponder how nurses are able to work for 30 years! After only 4 years I see that emotionally and physical toll its taken on me. (I found a small varicose vein on my left calf the other day!)

But then Jesus kissed me while driving home from work today... I saw the sweetest girl and boy riding horses in a field with total abandonment. They looked so alive...And it made my heart smile. Yes, its just all in a days work...

Its my Job

nurses

Today was my last day of work before my wedding... And boy was I excited. The next time I walk through those hospital doors I'll have a new name. My ID badge will have to be changed. I'll have a new name to sign a thousand times a day. And I'll have another ring on my left hand.

I'll be off for over 2 weeks! That's the longest vacation I've taken since starting work. I've definitely felt a little distracted lately... for good reason. However, I don't like being distracted at work. I am my best at work. "Its my job to be better than the best and that makes the day for me." (Yes, Jimmy Buffet I feel the same) But report was given and the work day is over. And I'm ready for my last week of wedding details.

Neverland

Sometimes I wish I could escape to a place where I have no worries, no responsibilities, and nothing but a handsome boy to occupy my thoughts and dreams. What a life! When J.M Barrie thought up the classic story of Peter Pan, he hit the nail on the head. I mean who wouldn't like to fly across the universe into a magical world where you never have to think of grown up things and you never have to grow up? This morning when I awoke that's exactly what I wanted to do. So with the blinds turned down and a scented candle glowing, I slipped my favorite version of the tale into my DVD player and took a trip into the adventures of Neverland... what a place.

Its so easy to get caught up in the crazy, fast paced world in which we live, to get bogged down by the sad and tragic circumstances that surround us. This past week I had a family member lose a good friend in a bizarre and tragic accident. I saw a grateful patient who had called me "sugar" for the last three days break down when she found the news she had cancer.

Its comforting for me to know that there is always Neverland. Don't we all have a bit of a Peter Pan in us?

When Life Gives You Lemons

After a couple of particularly difficult days on the job last week my fiance sent me a beautiful bouquet assorted of green, white and yellow arranged flowers. This bouquet was particularly interesting because sitting proudly among the flowers were bright yellow lemons. Attached the card simply read:

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

This caused quite a scene on my floor at my hospital because any flowers that come to the floor usually go to our patients. Needless to say I blushed brightly at all the attention while my heart smiled softly over the thoughtfulness of my fiance. I explained to my coworkers that I had had a couple of hard days at work and expressed my exhaustion over the phone after work one night. One coworker looked surprised and admitted, " I didn't even notice you were having a rough day." I just smiled and raised an eyebrow...

Yesterday at church our pastor was also talking about stress. He spoke of the pressures in our life that we have or will one day face. There will come a day in your life, he explained, when a situation arrives that you will have no control over and the stress of the situation will be too much for you to handle. Why does this happen, we ask? "Letting “all hell break loose” in our lives is the only way God can get our attention at times. God will often let more be put on us than we can handle so that we will stop boasting in our own strength and become desperate for His," He explained. Yes, there is hope. There is a God that is sovereign and in control of every situation. If we no longer see our problem as our own but as God's problem (God's cancer, God's addiction, God's job, etc.) then we are set free. We leave the situation at His feet and trust in Him to take care of the burden...

Ahhhh, what a sweet and refreshing comfort! Sweeter than even an ice cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade...